FORBES
Naz Beheshti | Contributor
It is human nature to fall into “when” thinking: I’ll be happy when such-and-such happens. We do this with happiness, and we do it with gratitude as well. We know we should be thankful regularly, but sometimes we just are not feeling it. It is as if we are waiting for good fortune to come our way first.
A growing body of research says we should not postpone gratitude. We can learn to jump-start gratefulness even when we are not in the mood. Moreover, it is precisely when facing difficulties that practicing gratitude can have its greatest impact. By making a deliberate effort to express thanks, in good times and in bad times, we build resilience and a positive mindset capable of weathering adversity. We turn gratitude into a habit, not just a convenience.
Give yourself a nudge
In a New York Times column, former American Enterprise Institute president Arthur Brooks writes about the paradox of making an effort to express thanks when we are not feeling grateful. We might worry that doing so is fake and insincere. Yet he cites a number of studies demonstrating the value of nudging ourselves toward gratitude. “In a nutshell,” he writes, “acting grateful can actually make you grateful.”
There is a precedent for this strategy in other areas. Even a forced smile, research shows, triggers the release of feel-good chemicals in the brain. On some level, the brain does not know the difference between a real smile and a fake smile. Amy Cuddy has written about how striking a “power pose” can create a sense of confidence in stressful situations.
Similarly, Brooks writes, expressing gratitude stimulates the part of our brain that regulates stress, as well the brain’s reward center. By choosing gratitude, even when it does not come easily, we can coax our brain in a positive direction.
Gratitude as a habit and core value
There are days (we all have them) when it is easier to focus on what is not going well rather than what is. These are the days when our daily gratitude practice becomes challenging to choose something specific we are grateful for. These are also the days it is most crucial to be consistent with your practice and not to skip it. Similar to any other practice, whether that be meditation or exercise, we must integrate it into our routine in order to cultivate it as a deep habit.
A habit of gratitude can be especially important in the business world, even in moments when expressing thanks seems counterintuitive. Brooks cites a University of Southern California study showing how gratitude can defuse tension in professional settings. Thankfulness has a remarkable power to break negative cycles and to encourage others to act better.
Business leaders can foster gratitude as a year-round habit by creating gratitude boards and appreciation platforms that encourage employees to express thanks to one another. Moreover, by modeling grateful behavior themselves, leaders can send a signal that showing thanks is a core organizational value.
Practice gratitude even when it’s difficult
If we associate giving thanks only with the good times, we miss out on the power of gratitude to combat stress and build resilience in difficult times. Embracing gratitude amid adversity is critical in the business world, where leaders continuously face new challenges and tough decisions.
Making an effort to be grateful in tough times is not a matter of seeing the world through rose-tinted glasses. It is about welcoming a challenge that might test us and push us to discover new strengths, and about appreciating the lessons we learn while facing daunting obstacles. As leading gratitude researcher Robert Emmons said:
“In fact, it is precisely under crisis conditions when we have the most to gain by a grateful perspective on life. In the face of demoralization, gratitude has the power to energize. In the face of brokenness, gratitude has the power to heal. In the face of despair, gratitude has the power to bring hope.”
Emmons cites research showing the effectiveness of gratitude in buffering stress and building resilience. He even recommends a strategy he calls “Remember the bad.” The point is not to dwell on the negative, but to look back and reflect on difficult experiences and how we got through them. In doing so, we learn not to take our current blessings for granted. We are also reminded of the resources that helped us weather past storms.
The true test of a gratitude practice is maintaining it in good times and bad times. Fair-weather gratitude might enhance those moments when fortune is smiling on us, and we should be grateful for the gift of such moments. However, life does not always guarantee an easy path. Choosing a gratitude mindset will help us make the best of whatever life (and business) dishes out at us—and ensure that we bring our best selves to life’s challenges.